With the proliferation of the internet, there is so much personal development advice out there. How do you figure out what is right for you? In this post, I outline a framework to build your own path.
Framework
Whenever you come across a piece of advice that resonates, do the following:
Contemplate
Often times, things that worked for someone else may not work for you. So, reflect a bit more deeply about the advice. What makes it resonate? Are there specific examples that you can think of where this advice would have helped you? Everything in life is a tradeoff. What tradeoffs would you make by taking on this piece of advice? Are you comfortable with those tradeoffs?
Planning
If you still want to move forward with incorporating the advice in your life, create a plan to ground the advice into your daily life. The plan should be structured to incorporate the advice gradually into your life. Most of us have a tendency to bite off more than we can chew in the beginning. Avoid that tendency and focus on building a habit.
Execution
Stick to your plan for at least 30 days. It will take at least a month of following your plan to have tangible changes in life. If you abandon the plan too early, you will not be able to judge the benefits of the advice.
For more on the planning and execution phases, read the article on being consistent.
Review
At the end of the 30 days, evaluate and decide whether you want to continue or make changes to it.
A Sample Piece of Advice
Let’s take a sample piece of advice and work through the 4 phases with them. Let’s say someone tells you that deep breathing is very beneficial for health. Here is how the 4 phases may look:
Contemplation: Reflect on your current breathing. How deep or shallow is it currently? You might try breathing deeply for a few minutes to get a sense of any changes in the mind, energy or body.
Planning: After contemplation, you feel like deep breathing could be beneficial for you. You realize that making deep breathing an automatic, unconscious habit will take time. To start with, you may decide that you will have a 5 minute session of deep breathing every day.
Execution: Stick to your 5 minute session every day. Reconnect with your motivation every day to help with consistency.
Review: At the end of the 30 days, review what kinds of changes you experienced. Based on your review, perhaps you may conclude that you want to do three 5 minute sessions every day.
Conclusion
You will be amazed at how effective this framework is for creating lasting change. Best part is that you don’t have to take anyone’s word at face value. You can test out the advice in your own life and figure out if it works for you or not.