Confidence is situational. We gain confidence in a certain situation by being comfortable and competent in handling that situation.
Think back to when you learned to ride a bike. When you were learning, you probably felt uncomfortable. As your comfort grew, you became competent. As your competence grew, you became confident.
We repeat this process across many other situations to develop confidence in those situations. This is also why we often feel anxiety when faced with a new situation.
While situational confidence is great, it has a drawback. We have to build it situation by situation.
Metaconfidence is confidence in our ability to handle any situation.
To gain confidence, we have to expose ourself to a particular situation and become comfortable. To gain metaconfidence, we have to seek out challenges and prove to ourselves that we can handle anything that life throws us.
Having metaconfidence can be quite freeing. We feel comfortable in the discomfort of not being competent. It allows us to try new things and take risks. We are more willing to step outside the bounds of societal expectations. We are more able to design our life the way we want it. We don’t worry too much about the past or the future. We plan less because we know we are skilled at adapting.
So seek out new situations, amass evidence that you can handle any situation and develop metaconfidence. I promise it will be worth it.